I used to wonder if my partner triggered me on purpose... Like does he even realise what he's doing right now??!
My mind would spiral, going over the events, what was said, how it was said, what it meant... over and over, again and again.
It literally was driving me INSANE!
And I had my big fat finger pointing at him, seeing all the things he was doing wrong, how he wasn't showing up, how he was the one who didn't care.
This relationship wasn't "working" because he wasn't, he wasn't doing the work.
I WAS DOING EVERYTHING!!!
Or so I had thought...
But when I began practicing "Taking a pause" and bringing up the mirror... I realised it takes two to tango.
And I began to see more clearly.
Through all the illusions.
Through all the stories.
And deep into my pain.
The years of hurt that I inflicted on myself and experienced from others, past relationships, friendships, from family and childhood, stories and beliefs that were passed down, that were keeping me stuck in a spiraling loop of suffering.
It was when I allowed myself to feel my pain and take radical self-responsibility that my life and my relationship began to change.
My relationship to self.
That was what needed healing first and foremost.
Often, we focus on what needs to change externally, but until we are willing to go within and heal internally, what's been buried deep—nothing will change externally.
And we find ourselves continuing to re-create similar situations, blaming, projecting resentments, and all the emotional experiences we know so well.
It's not a complicated process, but it does take commitment, and it's not always easy.
But I can assure you, doing the work will open you up to a depth of love, connection, and intimacy beyond your wildest dreams!
This conversation will support you to understand the root cause of your triggers and show you the steps you can take to overcome emotional triggers and challenges in your relationship, and to finally break the patterns that cause you to feel stuck and disconnected in your relationship so that you can experience the love, connection, and intimacy your heart deeply desires.
